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literature

Trapped

Deviation Actions

horcruxhorror

Published: Mar 28, 2011

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Literature Text

Here I am. Why don't you see me? The real me. Do I have to scream for you to hear that I'm dying inside? I'm trapped here, inside my own head. You see my mask. The one I don't even realize I put up. You never ask me what's wrong. You never ask me about the cutting. It makes me feel like you don't see me. I know you love me. You guys are my best friends. Don't get me wrong, I don't want you guys on top of me all the time, asking if I'm okay. But it would be nice if, just once, when I lie and say I'm great, if you would look me in the eye and say "No your not, tell me the truth"
I am an eccedentesiast, just a big word meaning I fake a smile. I'm one of those few people who, when faking a smile, can make it look real. Too real. If you watch, to see how long it takes for that smile to fade, it was barely even there.

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Something that came to me while thinking about how I just can't talk to my friends about what I really need to talk to them about (If that made any sense)